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Sandra Fluke Is A Fucking Slut

By LilDebbie in Science
Sat Mar 03, 2012 at 10:14:44 PM EST
Tags: (all tags)

Recently, Georgetown law student Sandra Fluke testified before Congress that, "without insurance coverage, contraception can cost a woman over $3,000 during law school."

In response, American patriot Rush Limbaugh called her a "slut" on his nationally syndicated radio program. Internet White Knight and Nobel Laureate Barack Hussein Obama called Ms. Fluke to express his support for her right to free shit. While both sides of this he-said-she-testified debate are warming up for a grand ol' culture war, lets take a moment to objectively assess her statements and let the data speak to how much this aging co-ed loves the cock.

In America, a juris doctor degree requires three (3) years of law school, so we may conclude Ms. Fluke spends $1000 a year on contraceptives. Let us assume Ms. Fluke's clear concern for women's health leads her to practice safe sex and thus employs condoms in conjunction with The Pill.

According to the eugenicists at Planned Parenthood, oral contraceptives cost at most $50 a month and may require a one time examination costing at most $250. This gives us:

$250 + $50 per month x 12 months per year x 3 years per juris doctor = $2050
According to the fine folks at the Condom Depot, one can expect to spend less than a dollar per condom, but for the sake of easier math we'll call it $1 per condom. This leaves us with:
$3000 per juris doctor - $2050 for birth control pills = $950 for condoms

$950 per juris doctor / $1 per condom = 950 condoms per juris doctor

950 condoms / ( 3 years per juris doctor x 52 weeks per year ) = just over 6 condoms per week

Finally we turn to the fags down at The Kinsey Institue to learn that single women in the 25-29 year old demographic (assuming Ms. Fluke wasn't an old hag when she started law school) who have vaginal intercourse four (4) or more times a week represent a scant 10.1% of the population.

Ms. Fluke is somewhere above the 90th percentile when it comes to having sex. Thus, science proves unequivocally that Sandra Fluke LOVES the cock.

QED

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Sandra Fluke Is A Fucking Slut | 122 comments (100 topical, 22 editorial, 0 hidden)
She won't do anal (3.00 / 7) (#1)
by Harry B Otch on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 07:52:07 PM EST

That's why she needs so much contraception.  It's not society's fault that law students are so tight-assed.

-----
A lamentable petty bourgeois cry of fear.-.

Uh, no...not this again (3.00 / 2) (#2)
by N0574 on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 08:16:57 PM EST

lol, "American patriot Rush Limbaugh "...earned a -1 right there.

- NCCTG N0574 CANCER PROTOCOL
Good analysis (3.00 / 8) (#3)
by MichaelCrotchford on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 08:29:58 PM EST

Alternatively, a first trimester abortion costs $300. But, if you time it right, you only need 4 per year.

So, with her "buy-3-get-1-free" abortion card, it only costs her $2,700 for contraception.

wtf, $50 per/mo for birth control pills? (3.00 / 3) (#4)
by N0574 on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 08:41:48 PM EST

$600/yr is outrageously expensive. Where I live they only cost $5/mo., but oh yeah, I forgot the US's 3rd world healthcare system is the most expensive in the world.

- NCCTG N0574 CANCER PROTOCOL
you present a strong argument (3.00 / 3) (#7)
by horseskin spacesuit on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 09:06:44 PM EST

I was fence sitting on this issue, but you've helped me to realise she is a slut, and the concensus is that she really is presenting america as a nation of sluts. if we subsidize this filthy behaviour what message does it send to our children and our children's children are we saying it's okay to be a jezebel? is there any truth to the rumour she was sleeping with the Dean, and this is all just a ploy to help her cheat at college at the taxpayer's expense?



This is quite literally the only computer I'm capable of not being offended by. ~ balsamic vinigga
If this goes FP (3.00 / 8) (#8)
by BottleRocket on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 09:06:59 PM EST

K5 will see an uptick in the number of idiot musings on NASCAR. Slut or no slut, I can't allow it.

$ . . . . . $ . . . . . $ . . . . . $
. ₩ . . . . . ¥ . . . . . € . . . . . § . . . . . £
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$ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . $
Yes I do download [child pornography], but I don't keep it any longer than I need to, so it can yield insight as to how to find more. --MDC
$ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . ♀ . . . . . $
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. ₩ . . . . . ¥ . . . . . € . . . . . § . . . . . £
$ . . . . . $ . . . . . $ . . . . . $
$B R Σ III$

It's a Title VII Civil Rights Act of 1964 thing (3.00 / 3) (#10)
by Blarney on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 09:13:28 PM EST

I mean, the Roman Church hasn't the slightest problem covering Viagra for their male employees. Shit, nobody does. Women can reasonably ask why they can't get birth control pills while the men get boneration assistive medications.

Abstinence would cost her nothing. (3.00 / 2) (#17)
by tdillo on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 10:40:15 PM EST

I feel so terrible for Ms Fluke. All the young men at her University now know that Ms Fluke is 'easy' and I'm sure she will be unable to complete her studies with all the wolves who will be shadowing her door.

In addition, what young man would even consider such damaged goods as suitable for marriage?

Terrible also for her parents who in sending their daughter off to school no doubt hoping she would find a suitable young man will now be forced to bring her home in disgrace.

I may not agree with what you say but I'll defend to the death your right to go fuck yourself.

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

w8 wot im confused (3.00 / 2) (#18)
by balsamic vinigga on Fri Mar 02, 2012 at 10:42:21 PM EST

how can she be a slut when you her page at georgetown offers you an opportunity to download her v-card?

Apparently abstinence, the best form of birth control, costs $1000 / year.

---
Please help fund a Filipino Horror Movie. It's been in limbo since 2007 due to lack of funding. Please donate today!

+1 SP (3.00 / 3) (#30)
by Corwin06 on Sat Mar 03, 2012 at 02:01:34 PM EST

Yay! Content!

Not that I even know who the fuck the slut is.

Also, 6 condoms per week at college age? That's one good night of sex, or two average ones.

"and you sir, in an argument in a thread with a troll in a story no one is reading in a backwater website, you're a fucking genius
--circletimessquare
I am intrigued by your written derivation (1.20 / 5) (#34)
by Zombie Jesus Christ on Sat Mar 03, 2012 at 03:45:27 PM EST

But you and I both know that theoretical proofs require experimental validation.  It happens all the time that some as-yet unobserved natural phenomenon renders the assumptions upon which theoretical work has no choice but to be based completely invalid.

While I'm a lousy mathematician, because I am handy with my tool I am one zhell of an experimental physicist.

Would you pass my compliments to your colleague Sandra, and ask that I may schedule an appointment for a short chat with her as to how I may contribute to her collaboration's research?

I Am Eternally In Your Debt.

--
Mike Crawford for Clark County Commissioner
District 1 North County
mike@communard.org

Paid for by The Communard Party of Washington State
Voting this up: (3.00 / 2) (#35)
by Wen Jian on Sat Mar 03, 2012 at 04:11:48 PM EST

But voting the counterargument down was a faggot move, Debs, and you should know that.
It was an experiment in lulz. - Rusty
well anyway (3.00 / 4) (#55)
by Marvin Suggs on Sat Mar 03, 2012 at 08:22:58 PM EST

it appears that that radio chap has apologised anyway.
The young woman we can safely assume isn't pulling the 3ooo number out of her ass, so I'd like to see what is costing so much. If this artcle we are voting on had any effort put into it, it would include this information also.

The REAL issue no one has mentioned is, why are drug compnaies in the US able to charge such outrageous prices for basic chemicals like estrogen? For anyone not from your country it really is difficult to comprehend how far back in the dark ages you are re healthcare.
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   .0. gimme a bitcoin: 1M9vApgDo5Dw45Awfem75mrVtMJvaMKpjy

+1 FP (3.00 / 4) (#59)
by HackerCracker on Sat Mar 03, 2012 at 10:06:53 PM EST

Insightful and hard hitting

Just a reminder... (3.00 / 2) (#63)
by localroger on Sun Mar 04, 2012 at 09:19:42 AM EST

You can't libel a dead person. Unlike a certain Carribbean shark munchie, Sandra Fluke is very much alive, and she's a law student who is already considering her options against el Rushbo.

And that is what is so great about the internet. It enables pompous blowhards to connect with other pompous blowhards in a vast circle jerk of pomposity. -- Bill Maher
Sad basement dweller has no sex life... (3.00 / 2) (#97)
by mirleid on Mon Mar 05, 2012 at 04:25:20 AM EST

...decides to scrutinize somebody else's to prove that they're having way more sex than he is.

Alert the media.

Chickens don't give milk
Best content in months, thank you sir. (3.00 / 2) (#100)
by Pentashagon on Mon Mar 05, 2012 at 08:33:06 PM EST

You are a gentleman and a slut.

She's in her 30s (1.50 / 2) (#104)
by Pseudonym on Tue Mar 06, 2012 at 11:21:26 PM EST

She's actually in her 30s, which puts her in a different group in the Kinsey statistics, as well as being older than most grad students. Given her age, it's also more likely that she's "partnered" rather than single.
sub f{($f)=@_;print"$f(q{$f});";}f(q{sub f{($f)=@_;print"$f(q{$f});";}f});
jews (1.33 / 3) (#105)
by McNugent on Wed Mar 07, 2012 at 06:09:20 PM EST

http://images.4chan.org/pol/src/1331158319691.jpg

Lawyerspeak (1.50 / 2) (#109)
by redelm on Sat Mar 10, 2012 at 10:08:19 AM EST

This might be a correct numerical analysis, but what makes you believe it applies to Ms Fluke personally? In a very lawyerly way, she testified "a woman can spend $3000", not that she did or would. Us numerates might miss the clintonesque nuance, but literates on Mr Limbaugh's staff would not.

I can only assume Rush chose a punchy "Sandra is a slut", slandering her rather than make the weaker, but correct statement "Sandra defends legal sluts" or "Sandra thinks women are sluts" or "Sandra wants Congress to pay sluts".

He wanted publicity, and got it.

here (none / 1) (#119)
by McNugent on Sat Mar 17, 2012 at 08:30:57 PM EST

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXXGQoksV6U&feature=related

My hip is bad, I might have a leg out of the socke (2.00 / 3) (#120)
by McNugent on Mon Apr 09, 2012 at 06:31:08 PM EST

socket. I don't have health insurance. Yet I would gladly join a right wing militia to overthrow the socialist takeover by obongo huissain.

V-card? (none / 0) (#121)
by thiswillbegreat on Sun Oct 14, 2012 at 07:46:08 PM EST

By v-card, you mean vaginitis card?  Thanks but no thanks.
Semper ubi sub ubi.
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Contraceptive implant (none / 0) (#122)
by anonimouse on Tue Apr 09, 2013 at 03:00:04 AM EST

I am not sure about the cost in the USA, but instead of the pill why doesn't she have a contraceptive implant, which can be good for up to 3-5 years, (the whole of her graduate education) and thus would give her spare money to spend on sex toys for when cock is not available or for when something "extra" is needed?
~
Sleepyhel:
Relationships and friendships are complex beasts. There's nothing wrong with doing things a little differently.
Sandra Fluke Is A Fucking Slut | 122 comments (100 topical, 22 editorial, 0 hidden)
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